Saturday, January 3, 2009

The Disco Handbook

The title: The Disco Handbook
The author: Bruce Pollack
Publication: Scholastic, 1979
Got it from: JL, Christmas past

A friend of mine, who shall remain nameless except to say that it starts with a "J" and ends with an "essica" takes great delight in showering me with horrifying books she finds in the used book stores. Let's examine this one a little more closely, shall we?

First of all, can someone explain to me why James McAvoy is on the cover in a hideous tie, silk shirt and tight polyester pants, dancing with a woman who almost has no eyes?

"You make me feel like dancing, the night away! (Yeah!)"

Never mind that this book was written pretty much during the last days of disco. The author is terribly convinced this will be the wave of the 80's!

From the back cover: "Let THE DISCO HANDBOOK be your guide to to stayin' alive in the eighties!"

From page 69 *heh*: "disco is the wave of the future, the main entertainment medium of the eighties..."

Wow, Bruce! It's like you looked into a crystal ball!

Here's a quiz from page 55 to find out if you're disco-ready. Answer yes, no, or maybe:
How's your spine? Does it bend?
Is there a history of heart disease in your family?
Are you prepared to disco regularly, four nights a week, six hours a night?
Is at least four hours of sleep a night basic to your sanity?
Does roller skating make you nauseous?
Would spending the next six months in a plaster cast put any sort of crimp in your lifestyle?
Are you insured?

What a shame I missed the seventies by a few short years. What a wonderful and enlightening time it must have been.


Anonymous said...

That book reminds me of good times. Really. Granted, the styles were horrible (particularly for the men), but...good times. And I still listen to Saturday Night Fever over and over. ;)


KJH said...

Actually, I would love to time-travel for just one night to a 70's disco and get my freak on.